The 5 Stages of Prime-Time

I love DeSean Jackson. I love watching him ruin team’s days with his uncanny ability to play football. This guy makes Devin Hester seem like a walk in the park to defend. And yes he is a bit cocky and well, stupid at times. But its ok, its all part of the process. Give him some time, Andy Reid is, and turns out he knows a thing or two about when players are overstaying their welcome. It hurts my football soul to do that to Donovan, who I’ve been a huge fan of as long as he’s been around, but even I am having trouble understanding all this nonsense out in the capital is in no way some part his doing – sidebar: SERIOUSLY, what is going on there? I know I’m not the only person who before this season felt that Mike Shannahan and Donovan Mcnabb were two of the NFL’s best men. Forget calling Terelle Owens team obliterator, I’m thinking that title should be reserved for Fat Albert, who has about 10 million dollars of The ‘Skins cap locked up so he can play 6 plays a game and break contain on DeSean’s new best friend, Mike Vick.

I can not think of a more electrifying, frightening or riskier duo than Mike Vick and DeSean Jackson. Both of which have an upside that is the ceiling of ability and talent in the NFL, and a downside that is the ugliest, scariest, hardest to clean up in the league. Vick is much less of a risk in all fairness, since he has already made it to stage 5 of “The 5 Stages of Prime-Time”. As for DeSean, he’s only at stage 3, so he’s got a lil’ bit of cooking left to do.

The 5 Stages of Prime-Time

Stage 1: Spending 75-100% of one’s signing bonus on something frivolous

Stage 2: Through celebration, causing or failing to cause a turnover.

Stage 3: Excessive Celebration penalties and fines, repeatedly

Stage 4: Getting caught doing something illegal

Stage 5: Doing work

So America, calm down, Desean will either just sit were he’s at and be harmless other than a penalty here or there, or he’ll graduate from the school of Deion.

Some graduates include: Vick, Romanowski, Ray Lewis, Vincent Jackson, "Prime Time"

Still in School: DeSean, Ocho, T.O.

Dropouts: Plaxico, OJ, T.O.